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Kim: Post-surgery & Birthday Conversation with My Sister

My sister Kim always tells me she loves me. She’s three years my junior and still acts like the baby who needs full care. Today, on my 48th birthday, I told her I’ve evolved past the point of accepting the word love without the action of love.

“I wish I was smart,” she said.

“What does ‘smart’ have to do with love?”

“I can’t say the words I mean.”

“Well, let me tell you what I mean. This isn’t to bash you. This has been on my mind for the last couple of weeks.” She called last month and asked me to pick her up and take her to the emergency room. I hadn’t heard from her in about nine months. “You always say you love me but your actions say different. You don’t want to talk to me. You don’t want to spend time with me. You told me you resent me and that’s all I can think about when I’m around you. This is how the world treats me and I know the world doesn’t love me.”

“Shawnda! You’re my only family!”

Last week she admitted herself to the hospital for a long-delayed major surgery. She was detoxed and prepped for three days and called me a couple of hours before the procedure. I hadn’t heard from her in a month, since the day after the emergency room.

“I sat with you for four days in the hospital. For four days, you slept through my visits. Didn’t talk. Didn’t engage. Your boyfriend walks in. Suddenly, you’re alert, you’re talking, you’re engaging. He may have a different idea of what love is, but I’m sure he knows you want to be around him.”

“I wish I was there with you now.”

“But you had the opportunity to be with me and you chose different.”

“I just want you to understand me. I want to understand you.”

“Understand what, Kim?”

“It’s hard. My life has been hard.”

“Life is hard for most people. Most everyone is tested beyond their endurance in some way. But no one can understand what you’ve been through if you don’t communicate. That’s why talking is important. If you don’t talk to me, how can I know what’s going on with you?”

“You’re right.”

“The best thing to understand about me is that safety is important to me. I make sure people who mean me harm don’t have access to me. I’ve become adept at removing myself from people and situations intent on controlling me. Being in a home where no one has power over me makes me feel safe. What’s the one thing you want me to understand about you? The most important thing?”

2018 visit to Milwaukee. First time seeing my sister after eleven years of avoiding me. We went to visit cousins and she stayed lucid for most of the visit.

“I’m the same person.”

“The same person how?”

“I’m stuck in the same time.”

“What’s the time?”

“Twenty-four.”

“The age twenty-four?”

“Yes.”

“What was the trigger at the age of twenty-for.”

“Will. Will and Deidre. I prefer to be quiet and keep them under the rug. And I sit on yhe rug.”

“No! Pick up the rug, beat them up and kick them out the house! Keeping them buried with you in your space keeps you stuck where you are. Far better to confront the memory and kick it out of your house.”

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Poem: 63 Today

63 Today 
 
Uncle Ed called to say his Big Sis would 
be 63 today. Oh! How alive 
that number sounds! I said I stopped counting 
at 60 for you and 45 for 
me. I’m still living in 2020, 
it seems. It was a good year, I think…. or 
maybe 60 and 45 were good 
numbers for me.  
 
It’s impossible to 
not remember, you’re always in my 
thoughts, but I worked today. Current job has  
kept me discombobulated. Life is 
emotionally taxing, financial- 
ly insecure, physically exhaust- 
ing. I’m guessing, life was the same, but more 
so, for you. I know you struggled, but you 
were so caring and grace-filled, it didn’t 
show negatively. How did you manage 
life with no focused care? No time to heal 
from one abusive phase to another? 
Were you ever at ease? Were you ever 
able to reflect and release? Did you 
experience joy? What did you hope for? 
How did you do it? Did you ever heal? 
Had you been allowed to age, would life have  
grown gentle and kind? Were gentleness and 
kindness something you understood enough 
to yearn for? 
 
Your presence was joy to me. 
What was joy to you? Was any portion  
of your earth time enjoyable? Better  
than bearable? Worthy of thanksgiving? 
 
63 today. Each year since you left 
I think I know you better than ever 
and not at all. Who were you, Terry Ann?  
What did you want for your life? Did you leave 
unfulfilled, aching? Did you give in, just  
let go of whatever kept you grounded?  
Wherever you are in life after earth, 
I pray you are imbued with joy, light and 
all good things. I pray no memories or 
shadows of your earthly sorrows travel 
with you. Should our spirits meet again, I 
ask only to embrace you with love and
gratitude. May the Creator of All
convey my prayer, my Beloved Mother.  
 

LaShawnda Jones, May 24., 2023
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ChatGPT: Who and What Am I? 

https://openai.com/blog/chatgpt

From my first session with ChatGPT   

LJ: Who am I? 

ChatGPT: As an AI language model, I don’t have access to personal information about users. Therefore, I cannot answer your question without additional context. Can you please clarify or provide more information about what you are asking? 

LJ: Who created me? 

ChatGPT: As a user of a computer or mobile device, your device and its operating system were likely created by a company or group of developers. However, if you are asking about your existence as a person or sentient being, that is a philosophical and theological question that has been debated for centuries. Different cultures and belief systems have different ideas about the origin and purpose of human life. From a scientific perspective, human life is the result of a complex series of biological and evolutionary processes that have been ongoing for billions of years. 

LJ: Are humans stardust? 

ChatGPT: Yes, in a sense, humans are made of stardust. The atoms that make up our bodies were created inside stars billions of years ago through nuclear fusion processes. Elements such as carbon, nitrogen, oxygen, and iron, which are essential components of all life on Earth, were formed through the fusion of lighter elements in the cores of stars. When stars reach the end of their lifecycles, they can explode in supernova events, scattering these newly formed elements into space. Over time, this stardust can come together to form new stars, planets, and ultimately, life. So, in a way, we are all made of the remnants of ancient stars. 

LJ: Is eternal life based on our composition? 

ChatGPT: Eternal life, in the sense of living forever, is a concept that has been explored in many different cultures and belief systems. From a biological perspective, our ability to live indefinitely is limited by the natural processes of aging and death. Over time, our cells and tissues accumulate damage that can eventually lead to the failure of vital organs and systems. However, some scientists and researchers are exploring the possibility of extending human lifespan through advances in medical technology and genetic engineering. 

In terms of our composition, the idea of eternal life is often linked to the concept of the soul or spirit, which is believed by many religions to be an immaterial aspect of human consciousness that persists beyond physical death. The nature and existence of the soul is a topic of much debate and speculation, and its relationship to our physical bodies and composition is a matter of belief and interpretation. 

LJ: What is the percentage of single Black Women in America? 

ChatGPT: According to the U.S. Census Bureau’s American Community Survey, as of 2020, 47.4% of non-Hispanic Black women over the age of 18 in the United States were unmarried and had never been married. 

LJ: What is the percentage of single Black Men in America? 

ChatGPT: According to the U.S. Census Bureau’s American Community Survey, as of 2020, 54.1% of non-Hispanic Black men over the age of 18 in the United States were unmarried and had never been married. 

LJ: Why are Black Women and Men not marrying? 

ChatGPT: There are a number of reasons why some Black women and men may not be getting married, and it can be difficult to pinpoint any one specific factor. Here are a few possibilities: 

  • Economic factors: Black Americans, on average, face significant economic challenges that may make it harder for them to find and maintain stable relationships. This can include higher levels of poverty, unemployment, and underemployment, as well as systemic issues like discrimination in the job market. 
  • Education: Education is also an important factor when it comes to marriage rates. According to the National Center for Health Statistics, Black women are more likely than any other group to have a bachelor’s degree or higher, which could be contributing to the lower marriage rates. 
  • Social factors: There are a number of social factors that could be contributing to lower marriage rates among Black Americans. These could include cultural attitudes towards marriage, the availability of potential partners, and changes in gender roles and expectations. 
  • Systemic issues: It is important to note that Black Americans have historically faced systemic racism and discrimination, which can impact their ability to form and maintain healthy relationships. This can include everything from lower access to healthcare and other resources to a higher likelihood of experiencing trauma and stress. 

LJ: How likely is a Black Woman to marry for the first time after age 40? 

ChatGPT: The likelihood of a Black woman marrying for the first time after age 40 depends on various factors such as cultural norms, education level, socioeconomic status, personal preferences, and location. However, according to data from the U.S. Census Bureau, the percentage of never-married women aged 40-44 was 15.4% for Black women, compared to 11.6% for White women and 10.4% for Hispanic women, as of 2019. The percentage of never-married women aged 45-49 was 13.5% for Black women, compared to 9.3% for White women and 9.2% for Hispanic women. It is worth noting that these statistics do not provide insights into the reasons why women in this demographic group are not married, as these reasons can be complex and multifaceted. 

LJ: How likely is a Black Woman to marry for the first time after age 50? 

ChatGPT: According to data from the U.S. Census Bureau, the likelihood of a Black woman marrying for the first time after age 50 is relatively low. In 2019, only about 2% of Black women aged 50 and over who had never been married eventually married. This is lower than the corresponding figures for White women (7.3%), Hispanic women (6.5%), and Asian women (4.2%). However, it is important to note that marriage rates and patterns can vary widely based on a range of factors, including geography, education, income, and cultural norms. 

LJ: Where on Earth is the safest place to live as a single Black Woman? 

ChatGPT: It is not possible to definitively identify a single location on Earth that is universally the safest place for all single Black women to live. Safety can be influenced by a wide range of factors, including local crime rates, economic opportunities, access to healthcare and education, and social and cultural attitudes. 

However, there are some places that may be considered relatively safe for Black women based on certain factors. For example, some cities with lower crime rates, higher levels of diversity, and strong support systems for marginalized groups may be good options for Black women seeking a safe and supportive environment. Some of these cities include Toronto, Vancouver, and Montreal in Canada; Copenhagen in Denmark; Wellington in New Zealand; and Sydney and Melbourne in Australia. 

Ultimately, the decision of where to live should be based on a careful consideration of individual needs and preferences, as well as an awareness of the unique challenges and opportunities presented by different locations. It may also be helpful to seek out the advice and guidance of trusted friends, family members, or professionals with knowledge of local conditions and resources. 

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ACAD – Fight or Flight: Exodus 14

Then the Lord gave these instructions to Moses: “Order the Israelites to turn back and camp by Pi-hahiroth between Migdol and the sea. Camp there along the shore, across from Baal-zephon. Then Pharaoh will think, ‘The Israelites are confused. They are trapped in the wilderness!’ And once again I will harden Pharaoh’s heart, and he will chase after you. I have planned this in order to display my glory through Pharaoh and his whole army. After this the Egyptians will know that I am the Lord!” So the Israelites camped there as they were told.

When word reached the king of Egypt that the Israelites had fled, Pharaoh and his officials changed their minds. “What have we done, letting all those Israelite slaves get away?” they asked. So Pharaoh harnessed his chariot and called up his troops. He took with him 600 of Egypt’s best chariots, along with the rest of the chariots of Egypt, each with its commander. The Lord hardened the heart of Pharaoh, the king of Egypt, so he chased after the people of Israel, who had left with fists raised in defiance. The Egyptians chased after them with all the forces in Pharaoh’s army—all his horses and chariots, his charioteers, and his troops. The Egyptians caught up with the people of Israel as they were camped beside the shore near Pi-hahiroth, across from Baal-zephon.

As Pharaoh approached, the people of Israel looked up and panicked when they saw the Egyptians overtaking them. They cried out to the Lord, and they said to Moses, “Why did you bring us out here to die in the wilderness? Weren’t there enough graves for us in Egypt? What have you done to us? Why did you make us leave Egypt? Didn’t we tell you this would happen while we were still in Egypt? We said, ‘Leave us alone! Let us be slaves to the Egyptians. It’s better to be a slave in Egypt than a corpse in the wilderness!’”

But Moses told the people, “Don’t be afraid. Just stand still and watch the Lord rescue you today. The Egyptians you see today will never be seen again. The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.”

Then the Lord said to Moses, “Why are you crying out to me? Tell the people to get moving! Pick up your staff and raise your hand over the sea. Divide the water so the Israelites can walk through the middle of the sea on dry ground. And I will harden the hearts of the Egyptians, and they will charge in after the Israelites. My great glory will be displayed through Pharaoh and his troops, his chariots, and his charioteers. When my glory is displayed through them, all Egypt will see my glory and know that I am the Lord!”

Then the angel of God, who had been leading the people of Israel, moved to the rear of the camp. The pillar of cloud also moved from the front and stood behind them. The cloud settled between the Egyptian and Israelite camps. As darkness fell, the cloud turned to fire, lighting up the night. But the Egyptians and Israelites did not approach each other all night.

Then Moses raised his hand over the sea, and the Lord opened up a path through the water with a strong east wind. The wind blew all that night, turning the seabed into dry land. So the people of Israel walked through the middle of the sea on dry ground, with walls of water on each side!

Then the Egyptians—all of Pharaoh’s horses, chariots, and charioteers—chased them into the middle of the sea. But just before dawn the Lord looked down on the Egyptian army from the pillar of fire and cloud, and he threw their forces into total confusion. He twisted their chariot wheels, making their chariots difficult to drive. “Let’s get out of here—away from these Israelites!” the Egyptians shouted. “The Lord is fighting for them against Egypt!”

When all the Israelites had reached the other side, the Lord said to Moses, “Raise your hand over the sea again. Then the waters will rush back and cover the Egyptians and their chariots and charioteers.” So as the sun began to rise, Moses raised his hand over the sea, and the water rushed back into its usual place. The Egyptians tried to escape, but the Lord swept them into the sea. Then the waters returned and covered all the chariots and charioteers—the entire army of Pharaoh. Of all the Egyptians who had chased the Israelites into the sea, not a single one survived.

But the people of Israel had walked through the middle of the sea on dry ground, as the water stood up like a wall on both sides. That is how the Lord rescued Israel from the hand of the Egyptians that day. And the Israelites saw the bodies of the Egyptians washed up on the seashore. When the people of Israel saw the mighty power that the Lord had unleashed against the Egyptians, they were filled with awe before him. They put their faith in the Lord and in his servant Moses.

Resource: Exodus 14, New Living Translation, Bible Gateway

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My divorce was not a battle.

A message from Lana Michele Moorer aka MC Lyte on her Instagram account.  

My divorce what not a battle. My ex-husband, John Wyche, has never attempted to take any assets from me at any time before, during or after our marriage. Anything that is written or said that states or implies otherwise is untrue and unfair. I do not agree with or support anything that aims to secure clicks and views by crafting slanted messaging at the expense of the reputation of innocent parties.  

While I made public comments related to the delay in signing papers, I can state that any delay may have been connected to his desire to save the relationship; never to take any of my property.  

Since this matter appears to be of concern to so many, I will use this moment to share a few lessons:  

  • Divorce does not equal failure. We did not fail; it simply did not work. I pray for his wellbeing as I do my own and I wish him nothing but God’s choosiest blessings. 
  • If you have anything to protect going into a marriage, get a prenuptial agreement so there’s no confusion if it comes to an end. As a matter of fact, make sure you protect all of your assets with proper insurance, financial and estate planning. Our people are far behind the wealth gap; get a financial education and do what is in your power to protect what God has blessed you with. 
  • Focus on love and truth. Be careful what you say or imply about others. No one is perfect and we all have something that we need grace to cover. With all of the mental health crises we are facing as a human race, my prayer is that we will see more commonalities of heart among each other and less judgement.  

#LyteIsLove 

I love this post. Over the years, I’ve often said the end of relationships deserve as much care and consideration as the beginning. Begin as you intend to continue and end as if you care. Be blessed.

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ACAD – Give Grace: Romans 1

Paul, a servant of Christ Jesus, called to be an apostle, set apart for the gospel of God, which he promised beforehand through his prophets in the holy scriptures, the gospel concerning his Son, who was descended from David according to the flesh and was declared to be Son of God with power according to the spirit[a] of holiness by resurrection from the dead, Jesus Christ our Lord, through whom we have received grace and apostleship to bring about the obedience of faith among all the gentiles for the sake of his name, including you who are called to belong to Jesus Christ,

To all God’s beloved in Rome, who are called to be saints:

Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

First, I thank my God through Jesus Christ for all of you, because your faith is proclaimed throughout the world. For God, whom I serve with my spirit by announcing the gospel[b] of his Son, is my witness that without ceasing I remember you always in my prayers, asking that by God’s will I may somehow at last succeed in coming to you. For I long to see you so that I may share with you some spiritual gift so that you may be strengthened— or rather so that we may be mutually encouraged by each other’s faith, both yours and mine. I do not want you to be unaware, brothers and sisters, that I have often intended to come to you (but thus far have been prevented), in order that I may reap some harvest among you, as I have among the rest of the gentiles. I am obligated both to Greeks and to barbarians, both to the wise and to the foolish, hence my eagerness to proclaim the gospel to you also who are in Rome.

For I am not ashamed of the gospel; it is God’s saving power for everyone who believes,[c] for the Jew first and also for the Greek.  For in it the righteousness of God is revealed through faith for faith, as it is written, “The one who is righteous will live by faith.”[d]

For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and injustice of those who by their injustice suppress the truth. For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them. Ever since the creation of the world God’s eternal power and divine nature, invisible though they are, have been seen and understood through the things God has made. So they are without excuse, for though they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their senseless hearts were darkened. Claiming to be wise, they became fools, and they exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling a mortal human or birds or four-footed animals or reptiles.

Therefore God gave them over in the desires of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves. They exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen.

For this reason God gave them over to dishonorable passions. Their females exchanged natural intercourse[e] for unnatural, and in the same way also the males, giving up natural intercourse[f] with females, were consumed with their passionate desires for one another. Males committed shameless acts with males and received in their own persons the due penalty for their error.

And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them over to an unfit mind and to do things that should not be done. They were filled with every kind of injustice, evil, covetousness, malice. Full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, craftiness, they are gossips, slanderers, God-haters,[g] insolent, haughty, boastful, inventors of evil, rebellious toward parents, foolish, faithless, heartless, ruthless. They know God’s decree, that those who practice such things deserve to die, yet they not only do them but even applaud others who practice them.

Footnotes
a.1.4 Or Spirit
b.1.9 Gk my spirit in the gospel
c.1.16 Or trusts
d.1.17 Or The one who is righteous through faith will live
e.1.26 Gk use
f.1.27 Gk use
g.1.30 Or God-hated

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ACAD – Give Grace: John 1

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God. All things came into being through him, and without him not one thing came into being. What has come into being in him was life,[a] and the life was the light of all people. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not overtake it.

There was a man sent from God whose name was John. He came as a witness to testify to the light, so that all might believe through him. He himself was not the light, but he came to testify to the light. The true light, which enlightens everyone, was coming into the world.[b]

He was in the world, and the world came into being through him, yet the world did not know him. He came to what was his own,[c] and his own people did not accept him. But to all who received him, who believed in his name, he gave power to become children of God, who were born, not of blood or of the will of the flesh or of the will of man, but of God.

And the Word became flesh and lived among us, and we have seen his glory, the glory as of a father’s only son,[d] full of grace and truth. (John testified to him and cried out, “This was he of whom I said, ‘He who comes after me ranks ahead of me because he was before me.’ ”) From his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace.[e] The law indeed was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. No one has ever seen God. It is the only Son, himself God, who[f] is close to the Father’s heart,[g] who has made him known.

This is the testimony given by John when the Jews sent priests and Levites from Jerusalem to ask him, “Who are you?” He confessed and did not deny it, but he confessed, “I am not the Messiah.”[h] And they asked him, “What then? Are you Elijah?” He said, “I am not.” “Are you the prophet?” He answered, “No.” Then they said to him, “Who are you? Let us have an answer for those who sent us. What do you say about yourself?” He said,

“I am the voice of one crying out in the wilderness, ‘Make straight the way of the Lord,’” as the prophet Isaiah said.

Now they had been sent from the Pharisees. They asked him, “Why, then, are you baptizing if you are neither the Messiah,[i] nor Elijah, nor the prophet?” John answered them, “I baptize with water. Among you stands one whom you do not know, the one who is coming after me; I am not worthy to untie the strap of his sandal.” This took place in Bethany across the Jordan where John was baptizing.

The next day he saw Jesus coming toward him and declared, “Here is the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world! This is he of whom I said, ‘After me comes a man who ranks ahead of me because he was before me.’ I myself did not know him, but I came baptizing with water for this reason, that he might be revealed to Israel.” And John testified, “I saw the Spirit descending from heaven like a dove, and it remained on him. I myself did not know him, but the one who sent me to baptize with water said to me, ‘He on whom you see the Spirit descend and remain is the one who baptizes with the Holy Spirit.’ And I myself have seen and have testified that this is the Chosen One.”[j]

The next day John again was standing with two of his disciples, and as he watched Jesus walk by he exclaimed, “Look, here is the Lamb of God!” The two disciples heard him say this, and they followed Jesus. When Jesus turned and saw them following, he said to them, “What are you looking for?” They said to him, “Rabbi” (which translated means Teacher), “where are you staying?” He said to them, “Come and see.” They came and saw where he was staying, and they remained with him that day. It was about four o’clock in the afternoon. One of the two who heard John speak and followed him was Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother. He first found his brother Simon and said to him, “We have found the Messiah” (which is translated Anointed[k]). He brought Simon[l] to Jesus, who looked at him and said, “You are Simon son of John. You are to be called Cephas”[m] (which is translated Peter[n]).

The next day Jesus decided to go to Galilee. He found Philip and said to him, “Follow me.” Now Philip was from Bethsaida, the city of Andrew and Peter. Philip found Nathanael and said to him, “We have found him about whom Moses in the Law and also the Prophets wrote, Jesus son of Joseph from Nazareth.” Nathanael said to him, “Can anything good come out of Nazareth?” Philip said to him, “Come and see.” When Jesus saw Nathanael coming toward him, he said of him, “Here is truly an Israelite in whom there is no deceit!” Nathanael asked him, “Where did you get to know me?” Jesus answered, “I saw you under the fig tree before Philip called you.” Nathanael replied, “Rabbi, you are the Son of God! You are the King of Israel!” Jesus answered, “Do you believe because I told you that I saw you under the fig tree? You will see greater things than these.” And he said to him, “Very truly, I tell you,[o] you will see heaven opened and the angels of God ascending and descending upon the Son of Man.”

New Revised Standard Version Updated Edition
Footnotes
a.1.4 Or through him. And without him not one thing came into being that has come into being. In him was life
b.1.9 Or He was the true light that enlightens everyone coming into the world
c.1.11 Or to his own home
d.1.14 Or the Father’s only Son
e.1.16 Or grace in place of grace
f.1.18 Other ancient authorities read is the only Son who
g.1.18 Gk bosom
h.1.20 Or the Christ
i.1.25 Or the Christ
j.1.34 Other ancient authorities read the Son of God
k.1.41 Or Christ
l.1.42 Gk him
m.1.42 Aramaic for rock
n.1.42 Greek for rock
o.1.51 Both instances of you in 1.51 are plural in Greek
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ACAD – Give Grace: Song of Songs 7

How graceful are your feet in sandals,
O queenly maiden!
Your rounded thighs are like jewels,
the work of a master hand.
Your navel is a rounded bowl;
may it never lack mixed wine.
Your belly is a heap of wheat,
encircled with lilies.
Your two breasts are like two fawns,
twins of a gazelle.
Your neck is like an ivory tower.
Your eyes are pools in Heshbon,
by the gate of Bath-rabbim.
Your nose is like a tower of Lebanon,
overlooking Damascus.
Your head crowns you like Carmel,
and your flowing locks are like purple;
a king is held captive in the tresses.

How fair and pleasant you are,
O loved one, delectable maiden![a]
You are stately[b] as a palm tree,
and your breasts are like its clusters.
I said, “I will climb the palm tree
and lay hold of its branches.”
O may your breasts be like clusters of the vine,
and the scent of your breath like apples,
and your kisses[c] like the best wine
that goes down[d] smoothly,
gliding over lips and teeth.[e]

I am my beloved’s,
and his desire is for me.
Come, my beloved,
let us go forth into the fields
and lodge in the villages;
let us go out early to the vineyards;
let us see whether the vines have budded,
whether the grape blossoms have opened
and the pomegranates are in bloom.
There I will give you my love.
The mandrakes give forth fragrance,
and over our doors are all choice fruits,
new as well as old,
which I have laid up for you, O my beloved.

Footnotes
7.6 Syr: Heb in delights
7.7 Heb This your stature is
7.9 Heb palate
7.9 Heb to my lover
7.9 Gk Syr Vg: Heb lips of sleepers
Song of Songs 6
Song of Songs 8
New Revised Standard Version Updated Edition (NRSVUE)

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Watch “Adam Arron at the Metreon SF 9/23/22 Avatar $ AMC” on YouTube

During the pandemic, I began investing in the stock market. I was slow to act and extremely timid at first, but my nature leans towards high-risk, high-reward scenarios.

In January 2021, I began investing in AMC Theaters to combat the short attack by which hedge funds were attempting to bankrupt AMC for their gain.

Retail investors (non-institution) of AMC are called Apes. Not sure how the moniker came about but it’s now proudly worn by millions of people around the world.

In this video, Adam Aron, CEO of AMC, speaks to his army of Apes about our mutually beneficial relationship. This is a great share from @CEOAdam
on the love affair between @AMCTheatres and #retailinvestors. It’s also insightful regarding business finance while in survival mode.

#AMC #APE #AMCApe
#AMCsqueeze

https://youtu.be/gysdIzjM4qQ

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Poem: Attention Seeker

You have my attention
never lost it, despite
trampling it with dismissive ridicule
What will you do with it now
What have you ever done
To keep my focus and hope
other than laugh and brag with friends
while keeping me in perpetual limbo
Indeed, have you ever given me
your purposeful attention
Focused your energy on me
Strove to be more than
a nice guy liked by all
Did you ever envision yourself
as a man of integrity standing by my side
A man of purpose joining his strength to my vision
Unlikely, as your form of noncommunication
layered with emotional hiding
seduced me into the shadows
I can think all the thoughts or not one,
do nothing, say nothing
and get the same wide-eyed,
“I’m a nice guy” non-response
received when I did everything
to look like a fool out of my depth
A foolish woman
who gathered all my available courage
to speak all my known words
of admiration, love and desire
To a being who sparked the light in my spirit
yet could not comprehend the nature of my offer
Now I understand my vibration
was beyond your frequency
You couldn’t perceive me
beyond the physical appearance
you considered unworthy of your commitment
My attention meant nothing when it was all I had to give
Even though it’s what you wanted most from me.
You were attracted to my light but had no respect for it.
Yet here we are orbiting still
What are your intentions?
Do I willingly enter your rabbit hole
of emotional grief with no hope of any satiation
To allow you to feast off my energy
Watch you eat
As I starve
You bask
I wither
You soar
I drown
You chose someone else
I grew in grace, seeking understanding
from a God who would put you
in my spirit, yet keep you out of my life
Maybe you were never the one
I was to commit my future to
Perhaps the real test is trusting God to provide
beyond what I sense in a life set on orbiting you.