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Sermon: I’m Hurt, So What Do I Do Now?

By Pastor Tim Dilena

This is a very good teaching on the principle of seeking and giving forgiveness. There are a couple of things I disagree with. For example the layout of the sermon. Pastor Dilena begins with a very profound and life altering and impactful example about the difficulty of forgiving. Throughout the bulk of his message he focuses on slight offenses (someone snubbing you in the street) and how it’s important to let those things go. He’s not wrong, but I think the volume of references slight in connection with the process of forgiveness undermines the impact of his opening example.

The other thing is that he insists that forgiveness means forgetting. It does not.

I believe a lot of people have issues forgiving because they know they won’t forget, or would have difficulty forgetting, a harm or violation. People don’t naturally want to be hypocrites. Some may think they are doing a service by NOT forgiving a conflict until they lose their memory. But truly, how common would that be?

I have never come across an instruction in the Bible to forget offenses, wrongs, harm or violations committed against you. All of life is an ongoing lesson. We can choose how we respond throughout the lesson, but what will have been learned if we can’t pass any test because we forgot everything that molded us in this life? The offenses, responses or reactions and possible resolutions are all part of our cycle of learning. They are all part of the things we bind or loosen here on earth that will follow us to heaven. (Matthew 16:18-19)

That being said, things will naturally fall from our memory. Offenses will loose their weight and sting. Time changes us. Life stages adjust us. Also forgiveness is a healing balm. It’s an act of love that works both ways. Those who ask for forgiveness are declaring they value the relationship they are seeking to repair. Those who offer forgiveness are not saying they are no longer hurt. They are willing to work through the hurt to resolve the conflict and move forward in the relationship.

GotQuestions.org explains it this way:

Isaiah 43:25 says, “I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more.”

[…]God’s “not remembering” is not what we usually think of as forgetfulness. God is omniscient. He knows everything, and He forgets nothing. However, He can choose not to remember something. In human relationships, we can choose to remember the offenses someone has committed against us, or we can choose to forget. To forgive someone, we must often put painful memories out of our minds. We don’t actually forget the sin, and it’s not that we are unable to recall the offense, but we choose to overlook it. Forgiveness prevents us from dwelling on past troubles.

That being said, enjoy the sermon. My scripture notes are below along with a few quotes.

Would you rather be right or reconciled?

  • Being offended is a choice. You don’t have a choice about what others will do you, but you do have a choice to be offended.
  • Hurt is porportional to intimacy. The closer you are to someone, the deeper the hurt.
  • Any hurt not dealt with will turn to bitterness.

It is not enemies who taunt me— I could bear that; it is not adversaries who deal insolently with me— I could hide from them. But it is you, my equal, my companion, my familiar friend, with whom I kept pleasant company; we walked in the house of God with the throng. Let death come upon them; let them go down alive to Sheol; for evil is in their homes and in their hearts. ~ Ps 55:12-15

For your relationships, you have two options when you’re hurt:

  • You can cover it, or
  • You can confront it.

We base our forgiveness on what God has done for us not what the other person has done to us.

  • He who repeats a matter separates intimate friends.

Blessed are the merciful, for they will receive mercy. ~ Matthew 5:7

Those with good sense are slow to anger, and it is their glory to overlook an offense. ~ Proverbs 19:11 

Above all, maintain constant love for one another, for love covers a multitude of sins. ~ 1 Peter 4:8 

One who forgives an affront fosters friendship, but one who dwells on disputes will alienate a friend. A rebuke strikes deeper into a discerning person than a hundred blows into a fool. ~ Proverbs 17:9-10

Put away from you all bitterness and wrath and anger and wrangling and slander, together with all malice, and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you. ~ Ephesians 4:31-32

Jesus answered him, “Very truly, I tell you, no one can see the kingdom of God without being born from above.”

Nicodemus said to him, “How can anyone be born after having grown old? Can one enter a second time into the mother’s womb and be born?” Jesus answered, “Very truly, I tell you, no one can enter the kingdom of God without being born of water and Spirit. ~ John 3:4-5 

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Sermon: Standing In The Gap by Pastor Gary Ham

For those of you who thought the grass was greener on the other side and found that it was not, this message is for you. “The crisis you are facing is not one of money, is not a crisis of relationships, it is a crisis of faith. It is your faith. For with God all things shall be possible. Nothing shall be impossible. Will you open the door? Will you allow Him to come in. Will you allow Him to strengthen the relationship that’s He’s brought you into the world to have?” There have been strongholds that have held you back from stepping into what the Lord has for you. I say in the name of the Lord , those strongholds are broken. Today you are free!

Listen here: Standing In The Gap

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Sermon: Family Matters – Present

by Ryan Kramer

Family Matters – Present from Casas Church on Vimeo.

This is part two of a great three-part sermon on family. My notes are below.

Notes:

The divorce rate in 1967% was 16%. In 1980, it was at 52%. What is not normally discussed re the low divorce rates in the 1960’s is that in fidelity in marriage was statistically high. In order to divorce on grounds of unfaithfulness, the infidelity had to be proven.

Also, rarely considered with the low divorce rates mid-century was the state of Women’s Rights. There were few opportunities for women to provide for themselves.

Due to economics and societal structure, women were essentially stuck in marriages with no way to exit.

Has there ever been an ideal Biblical family?

  • The First Family: Adam and Eve raised a murderer
  • God eventually had a do-over with humanity
  • The Second First Family: Noah’s son, Ham, raped his mother while his father was passed out drunk next to her
  • Abraham took side women and divided his household with bitterness
  • Isaac fathered and blessed his devious deceitful son over his rightful heir at the urging of his wife
  • Jacob’s jealous sons sold his favorite son into slavery

Family has always been difficult, shameful and painful.

Take Three Opportunities

  1. Take the opportunity to be present.
  • This requires action. It’s not passive. It’s a choice that requires a willful step.
  • Luke 10:38 Mary & Martha: Martha insists that Jesus make Mary help her. Mary chooses to sit at Jesus’s feet.
  • Jesus was an itinerant rabbi. He had no home. He traveled and stayed with people who offered hospitality. Sometimes he invited himself into people’s homes. He also traveled with a posse.
  • Martha was busy and overwhelmed.
  • But Mary chose the good portion. She chose to spend time with Jesus in proximity and conversation.

Are you Mary or Martha?

Truth: We are all both Mary and Martha.

  • We all feel the pull and tension to choose between what matters most and what the moment seems to require.
  • “Busy for just a season” becomes a life habit. There’s always going to be a season. There’s always another moment. That’s life. Therefore we have to make choices.
  1. Take the opportunity to define what family means to you.

Mark 3:19-35 Jesus went home, a crowd gathered and accused Him of being possessed. His family was sent for. They believed the crowd and tried to shut Him down. When told by the crowd that His mother, brothers and sisters were outside trying to get Him, Jesus responded: “Who are my mother and my brothers?” And looking at those who sat around him, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! Whoever does the will of God is my brother and sister and mother.” (Mark 3:33-35)

  • Family has a diversity of meaning:
    • Depends on what you grew up with
    • Becomes what you’re used to
    • Is how you structure your life
    • Could be people who choose to be together no matter what
    • Or simply people who know each other very well and share their joys and struggles

Have you thought about what family means to you?

What do you value from family most?

What do you expect from family?

What is it about you definition that is different from definitions your family members have?

Go share your thoughts on family with your family. Hear what they have to share in return.

What do you want to do about what you learn?

  1. Take the opportunity to recognize the gift of complexity.
  • We navigate life in compartments. It is exhausting holding our full beings back, keeping ourselves in check. Family is where the “real” is. Family gets the good and bad you – your worries, frustrations, joys, highs, lows, etc. Family is the place you don’t have to hide. You can be your true self. This is a gift.

 

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Sermon: Family Matters – Future

By Pastor Glenn Barteau

Family Matters – Future from Casas Church on Vimeo.

Family Matters, Part 1
Pastor Gary Barteau
April 8, 2018

Book of Ruth: Naomi and Ruth
Ruth 1:5 Naomi loss her husband and two sons.

Your family still has a future.
Grieve
Look
Dream
Choose

Grief
It is an healthy thing to be able to grieve.
It is an inside process.
It makes a declaration
Becomes a deep outside expression of how valuable the person was to you.
Its never too late to go back and grieve something you didn’t grieve before.
When we don’t grieve it’s difficult to move forward.

Ruth 1: 19-21
So the two of them went on until they came to Bethlehem. And when they came to Bethlehem, the whole town was stirred because of them. And the women said, “Is this Naomi?” She said to them, “Do not call me Naomi; call me Mara, for the Almighty has dealt very bitterly with me. I went away full, and the LORD has brought me back empty. Why call me Naomi, when the LORD has testified against me and the Almighty has brought calamity upon me?”

Look
Just because there is loss doesn’t mean all is loss.
Look for ehat isn’t loss.
For whats there. For God is bringing into the picture.
Naomi was gifted with two great daughters in law. She had a hometown to return to.

Ruth 2:11

Dream
Dream of what God has put in your heart that matters to you.
Those values and beliefs do not fo away. They remain.
They may manifest differently than you imagined.
Is iy grace? Acceptance? Family as a safe place?

Ruth 2:15-16
Boaz instructs workers to leave grain for Ruth yo glean/collect

As you look to whats loss and what is still present. Go build that family. You have a part in shaping what your family might be
Take steps.

 

Choose
We can choose to move forward.

Naomi’s grandchild is not the future she envision but she called herself blessed and Ruth better than seven sons.

We don’t get back what is loss from before but we are gifted with something beautiful and new. God remakes us and everything we need for life.

God my gift you with ife and joy that may be different that before but is a future for your family.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Sermon: Why Marriage? by Nik Godshall

Nik Godshall’s sermon titled, “Why Marriage?” is an excellent message about the beauty of maintaining sexual purity for marriage and continuing with faithfulness in the relationship. I love that as a young pastor, Nik confronts the entertainment, media and societal lies promoting sexual promiscuity. He shares how he himself struggled with what he was seeing in the world vs how he wanted to use his body.

Listen here and share.

Be blessed.

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Sermon: IN SPIRIT AND IN TRUTH – A Lesson in the Nature of Worship by Nik Godshall

by Nik Godshall

Excellent message! Listen to the sermon: In Spirit and in Truth.

June 14, 2015 @ Times Square Church, NYC – This is a teaching of the nature of worship. Worship is an ever increasing surrender of our affections to Jesus Christ inspired by the wonder of His love. True worshipers feel safe to be vulnerable and dwell in an ever increasing honesty before God. Worship is not about emotional escape it’s about spiritual transformation.

The most important lesson I have learned and am still learning. – Nik Godshall

Reference Verses & Notes

Jesus and a Samaritan Woman

13 Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, 14 but whoever drinks the water I give will never be thirsty. The water I give will become a spring of water gushing up inside that person, giving eternal life.”

15 The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water so I will never be thirsty again and will not have to come back here to get more water.”

16 Jesus told her, “Go get your husband and come back here.”

17 The woman answered, “I have no husband.”

Jesus said to her, “You are right to say you have no husband. 18 Really you have had five husbands, and the man you live with now is not your husband. You told the truth.”

19 The woman said, “Sir, I can see that you are a prophet. 20 Our ancestors worshiped on this mountain, but you say that Jerusalem is the place where people must worship.”

21 Jesus said, “Believe me, woman. The time is coming when neither in Jerusalem nor on this mountain will you actually worship the Father. 22 You Samaritans worship something you don’t understand. We understand what we worship, because salvation comes from the Jews. 23 The time is coming when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, and that time is here already. You see, the Father too is actively seeking such people to worship him. 24 God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth.”

25 The woman said, “I know that the Messiah is coming.” (Messiah is the One called Christ.) “When the Messiah comes, he will explain everything to us.”

26 Then Jesus said, “I am he—I, the one talking to you.”  ~ John 4:13-26, NCV

A Living Sacrifice (Give Your Lives to God)

12 Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. ~ Romans 12:1-2, NCV

Worship is a response…. When you understand the WAY that God loves you, worship becomes a natural response – you can not help but to love Him. Worship is a lifestyle. 24/7 thing… all day everyday.

Worship is  a process. There are some things that you have to learn to surrender. Coming to Jesus is the most freeing, wonderful privilege we get to enjoy as Christians. This type of worship takes honestly. Honesty is the birthplace of genuine worship.

The natural reaction to vulnerability is put up walls and wear a mask. He longs for unwalled worship. Surrendering brings healing. Sometimes we use our pain as an excuse to stay closed down.

Jesus will never betray you with what He knows about you. He will never use the truth about you to shame you. He will only use it to heal you. Only. If healing involves pain, He will not apologize for that. If He must cause you pain, shame is not the objective; healing is. Jesus will never betray you with what He knows about you. 

What is boils down to is trust. The safest place in the world is an honest relationship with Jesus Christ. – Nik Godshall

In Spirit and In Truth = New Life and Honesty

God Knows Everything

23 God, examine me and know my heart;
    test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any bad thing in me.
    Lead me on the road to everlasting life.  ~ Psalm 139:23-24

A Song of Victory

You have given me the shield of your salvation, and your right hand supported me, and your gentleness made me great. ~ Psalm 18:35, ESV

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Listening to Still, Small Voices

Still, Small Voices was the title and content of my pastor’s sermon on December 14, 2014, delivered a week after I posted my fury over lack of indictments for the murders of Michael Brown and Eric Garner in Let Ferguson – and the United States – burn!

I have long believed that either my pastors are paying attention to what I write and respond via their sermons or God is answering me directly through them. I truly believe the latter. 😉 Honestly, when I began listening to this sermon that Sunday morning, I was still burning in anger and frustration. I literally put my hand up and said, “I’m not even trying to hear you! There’s nothing still and small about me right now! My rage is too loud!”

But even as my hand was raised to push the message away, I apologized immediately for my rejection of it. So after sprouting my anger, I opened my ears and prepared to receive the message that was for me.

I didn’t take notes then, but I listened.

God is good. He maintains His hold on those who belong to Him.

I accepted His gentle rebuke just as I accepted my anger, outrage and frustration. I know everything in my life works to my good and my life works to glorify God.

Trust that there is a purpose for whatever passion threatens to consume you. Submit your passions to God and He will mold you into the instrument He needs for such a time as this.

Know you are blessed as you walk in your purpose and your passion.

To God be the glory,

LaShawnda

SERMON: STILL, SMALL VOICES by Pastor Carter Conlon

Quote: In a place of graciousness

Therefore the Lord will wait so that He may be gracious to you, therefore, He will be exhalted that He may have mercy on you. For the Lord is a God of justice. and blessed are all those who wait for Him.

When you finally discover that you have no strength inside of yourself, that your own palns, mannerisms are not going to work for you in this hour. I will wait for you until you’ve exhausted all your efforts – even righteous efforts – and I will be gracious to you there. In a place of graciousness – a place where the strong and the weak negotiate; and the poor and needed are shown kindness. When you finally run out of gas, I’ll come to you and I’ll speak to you. I’ll speak to you in soft, quiet confident way that will settle your heart and give you the strength to go forward. There is such incredible power in a small, still voice.

~ Pastor Carter Conlon.

Amen. And thank you, Pastor Carter, for being an instrument and a messenger.