Hmm, sixty-five years ago today,
You entered this world.
Twenty-nine years ago
you left far too soon.
Up 'til then, I knew you my entire life
yet, I'm still learning you more each year.
This last year, I dug up painful,
crushing information.
Confirmed details.
Connected dots.
Formed a picture of a childhood that wasn’t.
Saw the end of a truncated adolescence.
Now I’m speculating,
wondering when those first
predators attacked so viciously,
did you have warning of the next assault?
Did you have time to breathe?
I don’t think so.
Any time to think?
Where would your thoughts have taken you?
Did they give you time to be?
My poor math says no.
I arrived not too long after.
And I wonder, how
were you able to love me?
I don’t have all the dots,
but enough are plotted
for my heart to contract
over the violations you endured.
I see now what I couldn’t see then.
I understand why you never
wanted to go back home.
Always anywhere but there.
I appreciate the distance
you kept with certain people.
Ask no favors, expect no help.
I understand.
My heart bleeds and weeps for you.
Yet, I remain so very grateful
you stayed in the world
as long as you did.
I'm eternally blessed
you chose to love me.
You dug in to nurture your children
despite being barely more
than a child yourself.
You were present.
You provided for all our needs.
Thank you for standing and fighting.
For guiding and encouraging.
I appreciate you.
I honor you.
I love you.
I pray wherever you are,
Peace and Bliss envelop you.
With love forever and always,
Your Mini.
~ LaShawnda Jones
Harvest Life 